I’m not talking about whether it’s Topshop or Balmain I’m talking about the labels you give yourself, I’m a procrastinator, I’m unorganized, I’m not confident.
Ask yourself this, are you’re self labels allowing you to get away with things? So “I haven’t done that job on my to do list” and although it doesn’t feel great, but you know what “I’m a procrastinator” so that’s why I didn’t get it done. Stop letting yourself of the hook, you’re doing yourself no favours and you will continue in the same cycle.
If you are going to label yourself, start now today by saying the opposite, so for example replace procrastinator with “I am proactive” say it over and over again, and keep telling yourself that. Repetition is key even if you feel resistance push through it, you will soon feel the change internally; it will shift your perspective to a proactive approach.
Self-talk is powerful beyond belief; feed yourself something positive, that will nurture you and move your forward not let you off the hook.
Have a great day
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As I was driving home from an appointment today, this was played on Radio 2. I liked it a lot and wanted to share it, take 5 minutes and 4 seconds in your day to have a listen, you deserve it
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What’s important is how you handle it and what you do next.
1. Embrace it
Recognise why you are not ok and say it out loud. A lot of the time it only takes saying something out loud and admitting it to ourselves that is enough to make us take the first step to change the situation.
Go on, look your inner control freak right in the eye and say “I’m not ok” it will just squirm and scuttle away, perplexed. This in turn will leave you feeling refreshingly empowered and free. Acceptance is a beautiful thing.
2. Ask for help if you need it
Only you will know who or what that help will be. It could simply be chatting to your best mate about it. Give yourself permission to ask for help, it’s ok!
3. Recognize what needs to be done to change the situation
We always have control, even if its 1% we can contribute to change a situation, that change can simply be how we deal with it in our heads. We can choose to say “No I’ve had enough I’m over it” or tackle it head on with an action plan. Think, what is in my control to change this situation.
4. Begin the change
That first step can sometimes be the hardest so keep focused on how good you’re going to feel once you’ve done it or the relief you will feel. One step at a time, that’s all it takes. Starting is the key.
And congratulate yourself on your new found freedom in whatever situation it may be.
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I love Seth Godin and I wanted to share these words from him. I’ve added the link to his blog below too, enjoy.
Who goes first?
Initiating a project, a blog, a wikipedia article, a family journey–these are things that don’t come naturally to many people. The challenge is in initiating something even when you’re not putatively in charge. Not enough people believe they are capable of productive initiative.
At the same time, almost all people believe they are capable of editing, giving feedback or merely criticizing.
So finding people to fix your typos is easy.
I don’t think the shortage of artists has much to do with the innate ability to create or initiate. I think it has to do with believing that it’s possible and acceptable for you to do it. We’ve only had these particular doors open wide for a decade or so, and most people have been brainwashed into believing that their job is to copyedit the world, not to design it.
That used to be your job. It’s not, not anymore. You go first.
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I received some tickets to an event in London this past weekend. It was called The Fuck It Weekend and it’s ran by a lovely couple called John and Gaia. It was great, we sat on the floor all weekend whilst chatting, dancing and doing both mind and physical exercise.
I wanted to share one exercise with you that we did that I really liked. It’s really simple and you can get really fast results from it.
- Make a list of what you love to do
- Make a list of what you don’t like doing
- Make a list of what you used to love doing
- Make a list of what you think you’d love to do
- Start doing more of what you love
- Start doing less of what you don’t like
- Think about why you’re not doing what you use to love doing
- Start finding out more about what you’d think you’d love to do
Fuck it and do more of what you love!
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Every Sunday I go and visit an old lady up the road from me, just for an hour, her name is Bernadine and she is 87.
When I went last Sunday she was really down, upon my arrival her words were “I just want to die”, nice greeting I thought. And so we sat there for a good 20 minutes and I listened to how much she wanted to die, she really wanted to die on Sunday, it’s because she can’t do everything that she used to be able to do.
I asked her if she wanted a dance, that’s what we do most Sundays is have a little waltz around her living room, she loves dancing, it always puts a massive smile on her face. She declined my offer; if she didn’t want to dance I knew she was feeling pretty rubbish, she’s never not wanted to dance.
So I just listened some more as she then talked about how she was scared because she didn’t know what would happen to her when she does die, even though she really wanted to die, bless her she was just all round upset on Sunday. I said I’m sure you’ll be fine; you can hang out with your mates and your three husbands that unfortunately she lost over time when she was younger in life.
She was still upset, I said, “maybe you’ll come back as a cat”, she said, “I don’t really like cats”, I said, “The Queen, you’ll come back as the next Queen” Bernadine loves The Queen.
She looked up at me and said “wouldn’t that be lovely” then with a big smile on her face she said “Shall we have a little dance”, so we did, around her living room as we do, most Sundays.
“Life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you react to it”. Charles Swindoll
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You can achieve whatever you want to achieve. It may take time, commitment and hard work; in the end you’ll make it.
If you don’t make it, ask yourself this one simple question:
Did I do everything I could have done to achieve my goal?